“Who knows how much further we'll go on
Maybe I'll be sorry when you're gone
I'll take my chances
I forgot how nice romance is
I haven't been there for the longest time”
-
Billy Joel
This has not been going right
not for a while now
not as well as it should have been
And you have taught me to be brave enough
To admit that the fault is not mine
My time does not allow me
to make love as my priority
But love should be the priority
or it shouldn’t exist at all
I am glad to have you in my life
Don’t think for a moment that I take you for granted
But I’m unable to do justice to what is between us
Maybe if we’d met in a different time…
But then again, you did meet me in a different time
You aren’t the first I confront this dilemma with
And probably won’t be the last
Those are the words of a man who accepts his faults
without trying to change them
This, is not you
It’s who I am
We do not change into other things as we grow older
We become more of ourselves
Living free and wild
The hollowness we surround ourselves in
allows us to fill our lives with ourselves
and once in a while,
like a claustrophobe in a suffocating room
we need a change of air
You are my breath of fresh air
one that I do not allow myself
I’d rather stay confined, tied in to my rotten room
Unwilling to open the windows
Afraid of what you might bring in
I’m already too busy with the mess inside
I shan’t allow more
So perhaps I wish to prolong this
Perhaps I wish to postpone
I want to continue to coexist
In your mind only, without seeing you
I want to prolong love,
without the burden of being together
I want you to echo within you, as you would within me
For us to haunt, tug, and shout inside one another
Flaring years later, wiser, appreciating better
Like a bookmark
long forgotten in a dear title
What I know is I cannot move forward
Not right now
Maybe you’ll wait
Maybe you won’t
My loss if you don’t
Who knows how much
further we'll go on
Maybe I'll be sorry
when you're gone
I'll take my chances
I forgot how nice
romance is
I haven't been there
for the longest time
Vishal Gupta
2 Apr 2019
