02 December, 2012

The Sound Of Music

-           1          -

It’s been so long since I heard your voice
I fear hearing it again, lest it has changed
It’s been so long since I saw your eyes
I fear I may expect too much from them

I feared to talk, all this while
waiting to seize the perfect opportunity
Now that it has come, you seem so far
I wonder if you’re a figment of my mind or reality

I’ve grown so attached to your memories
I doubt if I’ll ever love you as much as them
Perhaps I have forgotten you
and of only your portrait I’ve dreamt

And I dreamt of meeting you once more
seeing those crystal clear eyes of you have
Once more I’d love to see your unadulterated beauty
which your graceful smile enchants

I wish to tell you more, of what I wish of when I see you
but I won’t, lest you be too embarrassed to face me so
But I promise next time we meet
my eyes will speak all I’ve never held forth

But till then, I see you in my mind’s eye
sometimes laughing, sometimes smiling, sometimes lost in deep thought
Sometimes lending me the happiness your heart pours out
and sometimes just walking by me as in silent stride

As the waves seldom rush by our feet
bringing the smell of your fresh hair to me
Holding hands, we stroll away
towards the sunset watching our way

I lend you a hug, only if you promise to return it
you smile at me, and embrace warmly
I wish I never need to let you leave
and in that moment, I come out of my dream

-           2          -

You told me once, that life is like a camera
and I should always smile, lest someone takes a picture
and keep it to their heart
I wouldn’t want that to frown in that

Little did you know, that as you spoke the words
someone was taking a picture and it was yours
to be kept in their heart forever
for he did not expect you to stay with him for long

Not that I didn’t wish for you to stay
you’d be with me eternally if I had my way
but my way isn’t what you agreed to, and went away
and all I’ve done since that day is pray

 I remember the time when you used to tell me little tales
and I listened intently, with a smile on my face
it wasn’t what you said, it was your voice
for happiness meant to know what I heard was the sound of your words

It was the sound of music, which I heard from you
and no other could be any sweeter
Since you have left, so have all melodies
and even my words aren’t the companions they used to be

I dream again, to hear that sound once again
but I fear it might have changed since the last time I heard it
are my memories of your sound sweeter than it truly is
or is your voice the only melody I have ever missed

Once again, I want the hills to be alive with the sound of music
and once again I want God to open the doors he closed
so the world may listen to the voice he took away
and the world be my world, and our world alone

I just want you to remember a few things
I want you to remember these few words of mine
I may or may not be with you throughout your life
but just remember that once I was by your side

You like to smile even when your eyes are wet
You like to laugh till your eyes become wet
You know people understand you when you speak to them
I know understanding silence is what you like

And you know that beautiful relationships have no name
‘coz when you give names, it limits the ways in which you can love
so you don’t name, and you love everyone
and so I don’t say I love you, I just do

I remember the day when I was sad
and you came to me and spoke these words
if you can smile when you’re completely broken up
nothing can break you the next time

And I promised you that I would smile
and I have done so till now
it was not the words you spoke which brought me back
it was the your smile behind those words

And you told me, never to worry
never to worry about the small things which happen with me
the things that I don’t want to see in my life ever
You showed me the sky, it was mine; you showed me the dews, they were mine

Enjoy the rain you said, enjoy every single moment of life
it’s all mine you said
because even the worst creation of God
has a very special place in someone’s heart

Someone is mad for me you said, (I was mad for you)
to talk to me for some moments, to hold my hands forever
to spend their life with me
‘coz I make them alive just by dropping a single smile

Make life easy by loving people
and not leaving them for some reasons
We fear to fall in love, but we love our family and friends
Then why not love a beautiful person

Who cries for you and forgets everything after every fight
and messages you and calls to talk to you
and hides every pain just to see you happy
just to confirm that you’re alright without them

So live life to its fullest,
and enjoy every moment as it comes
and you said it with a twinkle in your eyes
and I fell deeper for your cute smile

You told me that lonely hours were the best
because only in that time we share our secrets
with someone we trust, that is ourselves
in those hours, all I told myself, was I wish I was near you

Then I remember some words you told me
which I reminded you when you needed them
and you smiled that night, looking into my eyes
and I was thankful to be the reason behind your smile

Life never promised us anything
nor did God, but people did
Some said they would never leave us, lie
some said they’d love us till death, lie

some said we are the most precious one, lie
but life is a melancholy of such sweet lies
All that matters is, how we faced the time
when we finally realised that these were just lies

We might ask, isn’t life better without these lies?
But in truth, the only time we lived on those lies were the time of our lives
And from me to you, these have never been lies
perhaps that’s why I never got the courage to say them to you

Fearing, these might turn to be lies and I might hurt you
but today I know I’m incomplete without you
and I dare to say all I do and I dare to say I say no lies
and living life is worth living if it’s with you, else life itself is a lie

You jested once, and asked me
what would I do if you gave me an hour of your life
I laughed, for I knew I wasn’t lucky enough to get that hour
nor would I be satisfied with just that

But to answer your question, I said I’d want to talk to you
to hear your voice to look into your eyes
to listen to your laughter and to see your smile
All I want, is to be with you, all I don’t have is that one hour

And I smiled, and you asked me to laugh
for I could smile later on but laughter is a joy of youth
yet my real joy lay away from me
and I was left with a smile on my lips and tears in my eyes

For you were my first love, and that shall be unchanged
unfortunately, I was not yours, something I’ll regret
But I’d want to be your last love, as you once said
lucky is the first love of a boy, and luckier is the last love of the girl

I heard your laughter behind your silence divine
I felt your pain in your smile
I wish I could hold your hand, till you were strong again
I wish to never lose you, ever again

You taught me to uncomplicate life
to call when I miss someone
to invite when I want to meet
to explain when I want to be understood

To ask when questions burn me
to say what I don’t like
to state when I like something
to ask when I want

For no one is to know what I think
so better to express than to expect
We get only one life
you taught me to keep it simple

You taught me to party, to make mistakes
laugh endlessly and conquer my fears
I thank you for bringing life in my existence
After all, we’re young only once

You told me I’ve never lived a perfect life
unless I have given something to someone
who will never be in a position to repay me
That, is the purpose of my life now

But you have lived perfectly then
for I shall never be able to repay you
before you, I was one among the crowd
only to gain you, I strived and stood out

Whatever happened, made me proud of being myself
and somehow, I owe it all to you
Dear, you have lived your life perfectly
For I will never be able to give that back to you

-           3          -

When you went, you went with a song
which became the path of my survival
It is that law which I have followed till now
and now find myself too weak to tread the path

You told me that if I go away from you
then never should I return
you will not be able to stop yourself from looking back
so you made me promise never to call you

Even if I saw you along the road
sway my eyes I should, but not meet yours
If I make the mistake of seeing your eloquent eyes
I ask you not to bring tears in yours
You’ve already removed me from your heart
don’t drop me from your eyes too

You once prayed that I may get all happiness
You were my happiness, so why did I not have you
You made me promise, to never be sad again
so you have to teach me how to smile again

You said that I should never miss you again
So even you shouldn’t come to my dreams
you will not be able to stop yourself from looking back
so you made me promise never to call you

- Vishal Gupta
October 28th, 2012